Barak Article

submissive = introvert?
Saturday Aug 2, 2008 11:37 am

a previous post entitled "Is a submissive an introvert or extrovert?" by another community member:

(quote) "...I was thinking the other day about Dominant personalities and submissive personalities and introverts and extroverts...

Is a Dominant an Extrovert by default or can they be an introvert? Can they be either? i know they can be either but what do you think they are for the majority of the time?

Is a submissive an introvert or extrovert? (unquote)

(Barak's response)

I have been a busy this week, otherwise I would have chimed in sooner. This is a great discussion, and so... I figured I would put in my 2 cents.

While it did surprise people at the sRT/DRT combined meeting to learn this tidbit, I am happy to speak about it.

I am an introvert. lol, it's totally true. Now let me explain a bit - I define Introvert and Extrovert perhaps a little differently. I define them as where a person recharges their energy. For instance, Sheba is a solid extrovert. While she enjoys some alone time, she recharges and gains significant energy in social settings. The more of her close friends around her, the more the energy of that group increases and the more her batteries recharge.

On the other hand, I am an introvert. While I enjoy social occasions, and love a great party; I prefer my alone time, I relish in it. I gain energy from quiet time with myself, either in meditation, reading, the occasional video, motorcycle riding, etc... That is when I charge my batteries the most. I find that if I don't get enough alone time, I get irritable and sometimes downright abrasive.

Now, I know that this may come as a bit of a surprise, as at parties and events, I am quite the flirtatious social butterfly. Don't get me wrong, I do love interacting with people. I simply require some alone time. So, many times you will find me off on one task or another. This is my "alone time" among the crowd. If I am focused I can save more energy, and create a little bit of an eddy in the frenetic energy stream.

This doesn't make me less of a Dom, Top, etcetera. It is just the way I am. I believe that each person has their way of being, which doesn't detract from their ability to be an Alpha, a Dominant, a great Top, a willing bottom, a deferential submissive, etcetera. I believe with a greater knowledge of self, it is a benefit. Each person, regardless of makeup, adapts to feed their own inner fire. I think that is what makes AIS such a wonderful group to be a part of - with so many flavors in the soup, it becomes a unique blend and a savory expression of our personalities.

But, that is my


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